Questions To Ask A Girl On A First Date

couple smiling while the girl trying to wear a jacket

There are two reactions most people have to a first date: nervous excitement or dread. While necessary, first dates present guys with a lot of situations to stress over and ponder. What questions to ask a girl on a first date is a big deal. Other things to consider include the following:

  • What to divulge or not
  • What subjects to talk about
  • How to fill gaps in conversation
  • Who pays for the bill
  • What to do if it’s not going well?

The list goes on and on. We can’t help you with all of these items since some situations just depend on the chemistry between you and her. We have compiled a list of the best questions to ask a girl on a first date to get the most out of the experience. So layer on your deodorant, because you only get one chance to make that great first impression.

Why Ask a Girl Questions on Your First Date?

Couple date while having wine

Questions are the best way to get conversation flowing. Getting her talking serves other purposes, too:

  • It helps you gauge compatibility more quickly and accurately
  • You get to know her personality and personal history
  • It will help to relax both your nerves and avoid awkward silences

Once conversation gets flowing, watch as her shoulders relax and feel your own do the same.

Ten Great Questions to Ask a Girl on the First Date

couple sitting in a wooden surface while staring at the woods

Knowing what you will ask in advance can help you avoid grasping at straws to find something to say. Each of these questions can lead to fun, lively conversation. Be careful though—it’s not an interrogation. Don’t barrage her with questions and make her feel like she’s facing the inquisition.

Whether this is a first date with someone you met on a dating app or a blind date set up by a friend, the goal is to end up talking for hours and not know where the time went because you both had such a good time. Here are some great questions you can use to break the ice and get to know each other.

1. What Did You Do Last Weekend?

This is one of the best questions to ask a girl on a first date. It’s doesn’t feel like you’re prying into her past, but it will give you a feel for who she is beyond what you already know. Is she adventurous or a homebody? If she’s done something out of character for her, she’ll let you know. Maybe her friend dragged her to Vegas without much warning, or maybe she spent the weekend on a planned family camping.

This can add to a list of shared likes and dislikes. You might even learn something interesting about her that may not have come up otherwise. She could be a chess champion or head up a trivia team every Saturday night at the local pub. This will get you great answers.

2. Do You Like Your Job?

This is a better question than the standard “What do you do?” Her telling you she’s a bartender doesn’t give you any insight on what she likes or doesn’t like about it. Is her current job temporary, or has she found the job she wants to retire from? This will also give you insight into what kinds of hours she keeps and if they’re compatible with yours.

3. Do You Have Any Pets?

One of the most insightful questions to ask a girl. Why? Well, if you have a terrible aversion or allergy to cats and she has four, that could be a non-starter. But there’s something more to find out beyond her being a dog or cat person.

This answer can let you know her feelings about commitment. If she turns her nose up to pets, you might want to ask how long she’s known her best friend. Pets and friends can give you an idea about the length of her relationships and if she’s willing to put the work in to make those kinds of relationships thrive. You never know, you may end up being a cat person for the right girl.

4. What Are Your Friends Like?

Yes, it’s good to find out what her family is like, but there are better questions to ask a girl in this situation. Her friends are 100% her choice. You want to know if they’re crazy partiers, successful high achievers, or free-spirited hippies. People like to spend time around like-minded people to a certain extent.

5. What Sort of Vacations Do You Like to Take?

Instead of asking where she’s been, ask this question to find out the things she likes to do once she gets there. She may have just gone to Hawaii, but did she parasail and swim with the sharks or did she spend her time around the pool sipping drinks? This is one of the questions to ask a girl that can highlight a fun compatibility.

6. What Are Your Favorite and Least Favorite Foods?

This is a great question to ask right after food is ordered. While it may not be a deal breaker, you’ll want to know if she only eats broccoli and cod because it will limit where the two of you can go together. If she’s adventurous in the food department and you’re not, future dates may introduce your tastebuds to new flavors.

7. What Could You Spend All Day Talking About?

Of all the questions to ask a girl on a first date, this one can give you insight into what may trigger a pet peeve for you. If she can talk all day about a TV show you don’t watch or don’t like, can you live with that? This could be where politics rears its ugly head, and you’ll quickly learn if you share the same views. On the other hand, you two may immediately slip into an hour-long conversation about a common interest.

8. What Are Some of Your Biggest Pet Peeves?

Well, let’s get it out of the way. There could be deal breakers here. She may not like meddling parents but you talk to yours every day. Maybe she hates country music and you’re in a Willie Nelson cover band, or maybe messiness drives her crazy and you’re a self-proclaimed slob. There could be problems here, but it’s good to learn about pet peeves early on. You may also share the same pet peeves and be able to secretly judge others together.

9. What’s on Your Bucket List?

What a great way to understand what her passions are. You might follow up by asking her what she’s already crossed off her list. If her bucket list of adventures sounds like a nightmare to you or bores you to tears just listening, you’ll have some food for thought. You might find that you have a lot in common and, down the road, might check items off your bucket lists together.

10. Are You Up for a Second Date?

Ambiguity here is not a great thing. You both might have had a great time, but if you don’t ask for a second date, there may not be one. Just get it out of the way. If you had a great time and you’re pretty sure she did too, simply ask her if she wants to go out again. Second dates are an even better way to get to know her. You’ll both be more relaxed and already have a little history together.

This question also lets her know you’re no chicken. Most girls come to a date a little suspicious that guys have commitment issues. Ending the list of questions to ask a girl on a date with this one shows her you’re interested and you’re not afraid to show it.

Questions You Should Avoid Asking

questions to ask a girl on a date

While it’s important to know what questions to ask a girl on your date, it can be just as important to know what topics to avoid. Remember, you’re out with her to have an enjoyable evening, not to see if she can engage in an angry debate. Avoid topics such as these:

  • Who did you vote for?
  • What is your ex like?
  • How many partners have you had?
  • How much money do you make?
  • Do you think I’m attractive?
  • Do you want to sleep with me? 

Steer away from these like the plague. Some of them you’ll want to know—eventually. You may think you need to get these out of the way because they’re “deal breakers,” but a lot of these topics may seem less important once you get to know each other. Stick with the good questions to ask a girl on a first date and save some of these more intense or personal questions for later.


questions to ask a girl on date

First dates can be nerve-wracking, but they don’t have to be. When you have the courage to start the conversation, you’ll appear confident but not cocky. By asking these questions, you’ll seem interested without coming off as nosy. If one date doesn’t go well, the next one might. Keep trying until you find Ms. Right—she’s out there.

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