12 First Date Tips If You’re Nervous

October 23, 2018 by  
Filed under Dating Tips, First Date Conversation

Going on a first date can be a stressful experience. These first date tips will help you get over your nervousness and make sure your first date is a success.

Meeting your online dating match in person, asking someone out, or being set up on a blind date by a friend can be stressful. Experiencing stress, anxiety, or nervousness before a first date is perfectly normal. Here are a few first date tips to help calm your nerves and make sure your date is a success.

Planning The Date

Plan your first date carefully is just one of the best first date tips. Avoid activities that would put a lot of pressures on you and your date. Having dinner together can make for a very stressful first date since there will be pressure to keep the conversation going.


It is best to pick a specific activity so that you can focus on something other than the conversation. You should also think about planning a date that ends at a specific time due to another obligation.
Think about meeting for coffee before class, work, or an appointment. This limits how long the date will last, and there won’t be any pressure to maintain a conversation for more than half an hour.

Be Safe

Online dating is a great way to meet new people, but there are a few first date tips you should consider to be safe. Going on a first date will be a lot less stressful if you know you have nothing to worry about. Don’t agree to meet up in person until you feel that you know the other person well. Meet in a public place, and let a friend know about the date and its location. You will probably feel less nervous if you have an exit strategy. Ask a close friend to wait nearby and pick you up if you feel that the date is going south.

No Pressure

Some scenarios can cause you and your date to be under a lot of pressure. A common example is planning a first date at a restaurant. You can’t leave until the meal is over, and things can get awkward if you find that you and your date simply don’t click. Pick an activity that can be stopped at any time. One of the most important first date tips is to pick a data where there won’t be any pressure to spend a lot of money, talk the whole time, or spend several hours together.

Keep The Conversation Going

A common source of nervousness associated with first dates is that you might not know what to talk about. You might be worried about awkward silences or might not know how to make a good first impression. If you are nervous about talking to your date, keep a few things in mind. Don’t talk about yourself the whole time. Think about a few fun and interesting things about yourself you can share, but make sure you spend most of your time asking questions about talking about shared experiences and interests.


Don’t worry if you don’t have a deep and meaningful conversation on your first date. Ask about fun things such as your date’s hobbies, their favorite TV show, or find out which book they would bring on a deserted island. Preparing a few questions in advance will help you feel less nervous. Don’t script everything you are going to say, but make a mental list of three to five fun questions you can ask whenever you feel that the conversation is dying off.

If finding things to talk about is a real source of anxiety, ask your date to go to the movies or see a show with you. You can have coffee afterward and talk about the movie or show.

What To Avoid

There are a few things to avoid if you want to make a good first impression. You might be tempted to drink if you are feeling nervous. Limit yourself to one drink since getting drunk on a first date probably won’t get you a second date.

You might be tempted to bring up certain topics so you can find out about your date’s opinions or keep the conversation going. However, it is best to avoid topics such as politics, religion, or money. You should also avoid cursing.

Have Fun

Having fun together is the best way to connect and have a great first date. Don’t worry about finding a place or activity that is romantic. Planning a romantic date is something you should do later if the relationship blossoms. Your first date should be about having fun so you can both relax and open up to each other. Depending on what your common interests and personality traits are, think about going dancing, finding a local karaoke place, visiting a museum, or having fun at an arcade This fun shared experience will give you things to talk about will help you connect. This approach will make the date a lot less stressful compared to sitting down together and finding things to talk about.

Look Good

Your appearance can boost your confidence and help you feel less nervous about your date. Besides, putting some thought and efforts into your appearance will show your date that you care. Pick your outfit in advance. The best first date outfit depends on where you are going, but don’t hesitate to wear something that shows your personality and makes you feel good about yourself. Ask your friends or family for advice if you are not sure on what to wear.

Social Media

You will probably be tempted to look up your date on social media. You might have already connected on social media before meeting in real life.


Social media can do more harm than good if you are just getting to know someone. It can be a great way to keep in touch and plan more dates in the future, but you shouldn’t use social media to gather information on your date before meeting in real life.

It’s more fun to learn about someone by asking questions in person. You might have a hard time with keeping the conversation going if you already know a lot about the other person because of what you saw on social media.

Talk About Being Nervous

Don’t hesitate to let your date know you feel nervous. You probably both feel this way!
Talking about your nervousness is a good way to start off the date by being honest with each other. It will help the other person understand how you feel and they won’t misinterpret your behavior as you not being interested.

You should also ask the other person how they feel about the date and what their expectations are.

Be Positive

Take the time to create a positive mindset before the date. Remind yourself of your qualities and of the things you have to offer. Keep in mind that your match agreed to go on a date with you. This means they like you and see something in you.

Remember that there will be plenty of other opportunities to meet people if things don’t work out. Tell yourself that being nervous and excited about a first date is perfectly normal, but that your goal should be to have fun and get to know the other person better.

Your nerves will probably get worse just before the date. Find something fun and relaxing to do, or stay busy with errands. Sitting at home with nothing to do just before the date will make your nervousness worse.

Be Realistic

It’s important to be realistic when going on a first date. Remind yourself that this is an opportunity to get to know your match better and see if you click. Don’t expect to meet the love of your life. This could make you extremely nervous and you could end up being very disappointed.

You should also realistically assess the worst thing that could happen to manage your nervousness. You might be overly stressed about your date because you keep imagining all kinds of worse case scenarios. Pay close attention to these first date tips. Realistically, the worst thing that can happen if that you won’t click with your date and won’t see them again.

Break The Date Down Into Manageable Goals

This is a strategy you can use for any stressful situation. If going on a date seems overwhelming, break the date down into smaller goals you can manage. Your series of manageable goals might include picking out a nice outfit, being on time, greeting your date warmly, and asking a few fun questions to get to know them better. Add any steps related to the activities you picked for your first date.

Thinks will look a lot less intimidating if you approach them as a series of small goals. If you still feel overwhelmed, ask yourself if the activity or location you picked for the date was a good choice. Don’t hesitate to reach out to your date, explain how you feel, and make other plans for a date that is more manageable.

These twelve first date tips should help you control your nervousness and have fun on your date. Remember that feeling nervous is perfectly normal and that you shouldn’t hesitate to talk to your date about these feelings.

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